At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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