'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
