I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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