i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
