I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'm too high and old for this...
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
