She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
