sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
