i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It's rum buckets o'clock
So much Jack, so little girl.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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