there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I touched a dick in church today
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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