I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
there is puke in my bra ... again
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