Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
