No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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