Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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