She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
