You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
