Define "chronic" masturbator.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize