I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
