can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
