i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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