Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
