I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
