Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
