It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
someone owes me an orgasm
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
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