apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
