physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We have so much sex to catch up on
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
God I need to hump something, right now.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
