She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize