hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Sober January is a disaster.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
