this beer tastes like vomit already
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
