finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Congratulations! We have a period
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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