your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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