This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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