Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
