Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize
