My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize