brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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