Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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