Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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