So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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