While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
