Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
