doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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