The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
