Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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