Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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