By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
