i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
