I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It's shark week go big or go home
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
