You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
