the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Randomize
