Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
